I don't know which makes me sicker: this story about Burger King's CEO making oodles of money selling horrible food he doesn't even eat, or the actual BK food itself. I've seen the words "Enormous Omelette Sandwich" on a BK sign, and I knew it couldn't be good. It turns out it's a 760 calorie, 50 grams of fat monstrosity of a breakfast sandwich consisting of "two slices of melted American cheese, two fluffy eggs, three crispy strips of bacon, and a sizzling sausage patty, piled high on a toasted bun". Good God. The only thing missing is rich creamery butter. I pictured this jackass running up the side of a mountain, stopping to check his pulse, and looking down at the sea of humanity below him and bellowing, "So, what do my fatties crave today?"
One of my favorite quotes (it's hard to choose just one) is about their new "Red Bull-inspired" coffee: "with 40 percent more caffeine than regular", for those who "partied a little hard the night before," says Denny Post, chief concept officer." First of all, even if these guys "partied hard", they'd never touch a cup of that stuff (one of them already confessed to only drinking decaf). They go home to their mansions, after making their hard earned six-or-seven-figure salary selling garbage to bovine America, to eat their salad and tofu, washing it down with $20 bottles of mineral water. Secondly, I love the fact that they call those who are trying to get people to avoid fast food joints and eat heathlier foods "nutrition Nazis". The fucking stones on these guys, it amazes me. Wait, back up a sec: "chief concept officer"? What kind of made-up bullshit title is that?
Here's my final question: how do you cater to the 18-34 year old demographic if your food prevents them from living that long? How do you make money if you're killing the very people who pay your salary?