YOU CAN KEEP JESUSLAND
by Kris Salo

Holy hell! This uproar about ABC showing a naked woman jump into Terrell Owens arms is just insane, no? I didn't see the skit, being that I have the obvious disadvantage of being 2000 miles away from the nearest ABC broadcast...But from what I have heard it sounds tame enough. I am sure no t!t was shown...And no Sunny Triangle either...What is the problem.

The other night on regular broadcast TV here (France 2) about equal to CBS. They showed the infamous Sharon Stone leg crossing scene from Basic Instinct about 20 times in a row...Ok, I exaggerate...It was probably 5 times...But still, right there on normal broadcast TV, probably at about 9 or 9:30 pm. No one is getting all wrinkled up about it...And I'm sure that there were kids watching this...We can debate up and down the problems with the French, but I don't think they are any more immoral than your average american...

And I'm sorry Tony Dungy, but shut the f--k up. "Play the race card...play it....PLAY IT!!" If it had been a white girl jumping into a white guys arms, well we aren't taking into account the fact that there are colored people. Black on Black...all blacks do are play sports and f--k. White man, black woman...White man is taking advantage of the obviously underprivledged colored woman. Hispanics, same problem as above.

I am actually outraged that this stereotypes men as sex-crazed fiends...oh wait...Nevermind, my outrage is gone.

This island that we're going to have...I'm not saying that we have to have 24/7 porn (i'm not saying that we don't either)...But let me tell you something. The TV is going to show life how it is...Shiny happy people holding hands.

I, for one, advocate the return of the subversive committees...Instead of seeking out reds this time, we're going to seek out all those who try to ruin the American way of life by putting words like sh!t on TV and showing non-frontal nudity after 9pm.

That's right, vote Line one SALO for US Senate in 2008...Wait, what's the minimum age for Senate...Ok scatch that, Salo line one for US House of Reps 2006. Someone's got to change this system, and those fat cats in Washington aren't doing sh...squat!!